By Joan Smith
Perhaps this is familiar to others: I grew up in a world of “I told you that you shouldn’t do that; it never works” and “I don’t know why you feel like that, what’s wrong with you?” I began feeling like I couldn’t do anything right and something was seriously wrong with me because of the feelings I was having.
Then I met a professional coach who opened my mind to limitless possibilities. I fondly remember many conversations beginning with an unsolvable problem and ending with me laughing at how I limited myself with my internal conversations. I took her Certified Professional Coach class and realized I had been feeding this negative language to my children and my spouse, poisoning my relationships.
Before coach training, I was a terrible communicator. I was over-explaining and focusing on what I didn’t want. I learned the human mind processes in the positive. “I don’t want you to keep your shoes on” is remembered as “keep your shoes on.” I learned about I statements in a way that made sense because it is about owning my feelings. Now I am empowered by the realization that I control my happiness. I choose how to think and what I feel. Coaching is amazing and coach training is a whole new skill set that helps everyone.