A soft-spoken person, also considered a passive communicator, hesitates to promote their own opinion. Their preference is to listen first and think it through. When a soft-spoken person is comfortable with their coach, it is easier for them to talk.
Client Henry seems to be shy at first. Because of this and his slower pace in decision-making, advancement on the job has been slow over the years. Henry has augmented his education, worked hard for the company, and wants a managerial role. Coaching began with the coach focusing on understanding Henry to develop a coaching style that worked for Henry.
Tips for Recognizing the Soft-spoken:
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Allows others to speak first
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Takes time to think it through
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Takes time to express their thoughts or opinions
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Open to persuasion
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Slow to make decisions
Tips for Coaching the Soft-spoken:
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Ask if they want to set the agenda for a coaching session in advance to allow time to think or prepare
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Ask them to evaluate their process for deciding
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Respectfully be silent while they think
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Ask for their internal motivation
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Encourage them to explore possibilities
Given a choice by the coach, Henry decided to develop the agenda for each coaching session at the conclusion of the session before. The coach worked with Henry to list what he would research and think about between sessions to prepare.
One of the areas Henry chose to research was characteristics of successful leaders or managers. In a subsequent session, Henry was ready to identify skills and commit to choosing change. The coach asked Henry which skills he currently had that would serve him, and which skills he wanted to develop. Through planning and accountability with the coach, Henry learned to voice ideas and increased his visibility at work. Henry earned a promotion. He continues to work with his coach for the next goal on his list.
