A natural tendency in conversations is to share what happened, consider how or why it happened, and discuss the implications. When these conversations occur with friends, empathy is typical. A mentor has the role of telling a mentee what they should do next. A coach has a very different role – the coach asks the client about their options.
Working with a coach, the focus is shifted toward future action steps to move beyond what occurred; the client is naturally motivated to consider outcomes and choose options. The coach focuses the client on how they want to move motivation coachforward.
Imagine this conversation:
Pat: A co-worker lied to my boss about what happened and made me look like an idiot!
Friend: Wow, you must be so mad at them!
Mentor: What you should do is confront the co-worker and explain it to your boss.
Coach: What outcome would you like to work towards now?
The value of the friend is having someone understand and support. The value of the mentor is their experience. The value of the coach is they empower you to think it through and make intentional choices about your actions.
When a coach empowers a client to consider their options, the client takes control of their response and is motivated to focus on what they want to do moving forward.